one more mid-term test down. one project down. all on the same day. feeling light and relieved :)

well not exactly. sigh. had a pleasant little surprise from you yesterday. nothing really significant, but still...arrgh. i don't want to read too much into it. somehow i am already so...sian? jaded? tired? even before anything starts. don't want to get all pretty and suffer an ungraceful fall.

i feel so controlled...too controlled to give in to that little absurbity and unrationality that used to give me such elation. no matter how false and short-lived it may be. hmm. but i think it's healthy to bluff ourselves sometimes...works like mental pampering.

argh. i just can't put this into words. been a long time since i have that wierd feeling.

unsettled...just like sitting on prickly grass.